Madelyn came home pretty confused about something today. She said she called her sweet friend Kash in her neighboring 2nd grade class her "favorite boy-friend" and now it has got everyone all a twitter (whispering, giggling, pointing) on this fabulous Valentine's Day. So much of a twitter that she came home with a sack FULL of dum-dums from said Kash. I grinned and grimaced a little and asked her what she meant by "favorite boy-friend". She looked at me like I was from a different planet and stated, "you know, a friend that's a boy." With amusement and relief, I said that using the word "boyfriend" can actually mean a lot more than that. She asks, "What does it mean, Mom?" "A boy that....um.... you want ....um.....to spend time with ....um....more than any other boy..... "Oh, okay, Mom." Phew, close enough for now. I'm so desperate to preserve her innocence, to not introduce things too soon.
So, what should I tell Madelyn to call her friends that are boys? She instinctively calls them "boyfriends" but has caught on that calling them that gets strange behaviors from her friends (and even adults). She doesn't like "guyfriends" because "Mom, they're BOYS!" And saying "he's my favorite (or best) friend that is a boy" just doesn't have that special ring to it..... Any ideas?
3 comments:
Hmmm, I was hoping there would be some good advice over here by now! I thought Bethany might be a good source of wisdom--she thought we should do a google search. It was not so productive. ;-) She suggested just referring to all as friends. But in this case, since she's comparing to other friends who are boys, she might just say out of all the other boys, you are my best friend. Probably, it will just blow over, but it never hurts to check with the teacher to make sure nothing has gotten blown out of proportion.
Thanks, Tracy and Bethany! Ben thought the same as Bethany. "Why not just friend?" I guess that makes as much sense as anything else. Why make the distinction anyway? Although, Tracy, you are one of my best (girl)friends....
Awe, bless her precious little heart. I'm totally with Madelyn in my confusion about the distinction that has to be made but I also completely understand that there is, unfortunately, a definite distinction and inference associated with the word 'boyfriend'. Maybe she could say 'friend boy'? It's not a cumbersome as saying 'friend who is a boy', but it means the same thing. Just trying to think of SOMETHING.
Kash did not seem to mind a bit, so she obviously was quite astute in her choice of favorite friend boys. Although normally I tell my kids that dum dums are what you want to stay away from. Looks wear out but stupid is forever. All my kids chose wisely; they all married someone pretty AND smart. That's right, Brandon and Mike, pretty. Deal with it. And now I have 4.9 gorgeous, brilliant grandchildren. GOD IS GOOD!!
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